Two More Days!

Ok, so I have aaaaaallllllllllll of these posts I want to put up, BUT I am currently without internet at my new place. With only internet at work, I haven't really had a chance to put anything together like I want too.

So I am just stopping by to join in a quick little round of Gratitudes.

I am so grateful to finally be almost  unpacked. Just the dreaded "second bedroom" (soon to be office) and decorating really, and then those straggling pieces of random stuff that we aren't sure what to do with. They usually end up getting thrown away...

Warm weather! I mean, this week has been pretty rainy. But it has been a Spring rain and not a Winter rain. Which means, in my neck of the woods, the smell of rain hitting warm pavement, the humidity bringing out all the fragrances of spring blossoms and cozying up to my hubby while we watch Star Wars.

Speaking of Star Wars, yes. It is something I'm grateful for. Star Wars is awesome. And I have never seen all of the "new" ones. So this week we finally made it through the third one. Totally explains Darth Vader. I get it now.

Most of all, I am STOKED for my cruise! We leave for Disney World on Saturday. After four days in the magic land of Disney we head off for our four day cruise to the Bahamas! That is just two days away. One more work day. I am sooooo excited (and spazzing OUT) about going on my very first cruise.

For all y'all that have been a-cruisin' before, any advice? I'm assembling my packing list right now. Anything I should absolutely bring? Anything that isn't necessary? What was your favorite part of the cruise? I'm so excited and nervous, I need more info!

And does anyone have any request of great/weird/awesome pictures in Disney World. I'm dedicating a few rides to my brother who is in Honduras, and I'll be sending him pictures of me either ON the ride or right before. So, I'm taking requests from other people too. Give me a list!

Alright folks, I'll try to check in soon, but it might not be until AFTER the cruise happens... we'll see.

(Linking up with:  Whatever, Whenever, So What, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday,)

It Is All About Love

I have recently had the great privilege of learning more about adoption and the great impact it has on people's lives. Both adoptive parents and birth parents have entered my life, and I can not be happier or more grateful for the experience.

My sister in law, the wonderful Julianne from Made By Jewls adopted a little baby boy this week. And he is the most precious, beautiful baby you have ever seen. I was so happy to see her filled with joy and love at her sweet little boy. During her adoption process I also had the pleasure of meeting and getting to know the birth mom. She was such a strong and sweet and wonderful woman. I can't even begin to tell you how incredible she is, and her whole family for that matter.

I know that so many people have had to struggle with infertility and the long road to adoption. I've seen many tears shed for children that never seem to come to couples just aching to hold their babies. I know a lot of people are hoping to adopt, and I know that the best way to help them is to spread the word.

So, today, I would like to introduce you to Jenna and David.

Jenna is like a sister to me. She is the person I turn to for advice, for a laugh, for understanding. She has quickly become one of my best friends. There are so many things I could tell you about how she is the sweetest person in the world. But I will have to settle for just a few of them.

Jenna is always, and I mean always, involved in some kind of volunteer work. Whenever we get a chance to chat I get to hear about how passionate she is about the many organizations she is involved in. From the Big Brother, Big Sister organization to Blessings in a Basket, Jenna is always looking for ways to help others. Something I admire most? She is deeply involved in helping birth mom's lead the best lives possible. She understands how complex and often painful adoption can be for birth moms, and she is there supporting them as best she can.

She contributes often to Big Tough Girl blog, a place for dedicated to the birth mom community. But enough about how selfless she is (you make us all look bad Jenna) let's talk about my other favorite part about Jenna. Her personality.

Jenna has the BEST sense of humor and can always make me laugh. Like.... really laugh. Here let me show you

Obviously, they are both pretty awesome. Like... really awesome.

Let's not forget her other half! Meet David (in his own words no less!)
"Hi! I'm David and I wanted to give you an idea who I am. Forgive me if this sounds stiff or cheesy! I was born in Maryland , raised in NJ & graduated from college with a degree in education. I love singing in the choir (I'm planning on joining the choir at our church!) playing board games, traveling and trying new things. I have 1 cat, Snala-Wallaby, and I love to pet her little nose because she curls up in my lap and purrs!  I LOVE going to hockey games, football games, baseball games..any game really!

In case you were wondering, yes that is David trying to walk a cat. He has some mad skills.

 
I am the "behind the scenes" kind of guy. I don't want to be in the spotlight or responsible for public speaking. (I let Jenna handle all of that!! She's too outgoing! She will talk to ANYONE!!) I want to be the one making sure that all the work is done correctly and everything is ready." 

Something I have found interesting when talking to several different Big Tough Girls (also known as birth moms) they have often said (not always, but several have commented) that the reason they choose the family that they did for their baby was because of the dad. I know that David would be the best dad ever.

So, after all of this, what I am asking is that you visit their profile and pass their information along. They have been on one heart wrenching journey after another to complete their family. I think it is time they found their Happily Ever After: Baby Edition.

 Visit their profile here:
http://kingadoption.blogspot.com
And their facebook profiles here and here

(linking up with Friends Connect Blog Hop)

Stuff and News and Updates

Hey guys. I know its been a while. And I am ok with that. I just wasn't really in a "blogging" place. Which is cool.

But I am starting to miss it a bit, and everything is changing and I am feeling the need to write. So here I am!

Here is what has happened over the last couple of months:

• New Job - I LOVE my new job. I work as an executive assistant and do a little bit of everything. It never gets boring, and I love the people I work with.
• New Apartment - That's right! We finally have a place of our own. We moved just this past weekend and the place is a complete disaster right now. It is a rather small space, but it is all ours so that makes me happy. Look forward to some decorating and projects coming your way.
• New Plans - In 10 days (AHHHH!!!!) my husband and I leave for a Disney World and a Cruise to the Bahamas. I couldn't be more excited. SUNSHINE! (And considering it snowed on May Day I think a large dose of sunshine is in order.)
• New Eating Habits - The past few weeks I have come to some realizations (which I will talk about later) and it looks like I am going Paleo/Primal (There is a difference, more on that later). 
• New Life Plan - yeah way more on this later. Promise.
• New Hair - I went ombre. For reals. here is a picture.

So.... that's everything for now. It is all rather crazy how much is changing and how much I love the changes.

Has anyone "gone paleo" before? What did you like/dislike about it? And would anyone be interested in doing some guest posts while I am gone on my awesome vacation? Let me know!

Small Soul Scribbles

I have had questions as to why I have been so silent on the blog front.

I don't really have answers. I started a new job, and I have to be to work early in the morning. I do yoga almost every night which is an hour and a half out of my limited free time. And then the usual homework and housework fills in the cracks. I carve out time for my sweet husband, and then I am left with very little sleep.

I'm not sure why else I haven't blogged. I've had blog ideas. But I haven't felt the need. I don't know, it isn't the top of my list. Yoga trumps it. Husband time trumps it. Sleep trumps it. This doesn't mean I'm not going to blog EVER. It just means my life is currently evolving. I'm evolving, and now I need different things.

I've needed this blog for a lot of things. To write out all of my feelings. As a creative outlet. As a platform when needed. But lately... I've been turning inward. I've been reading and breathing and meditating. And I have been writing, but they have been small soul scribbles. Little things that I tuck away in my journal.

I love this community. I'm just in a different place. So I'll blog when I need too or have the urge to update the world. But it has been rather nice being more of an introvert lately. I love you ALL. And I am still a daily blog reader. Just not a writer.

And that's ok.

Frustrations in Guilt

Let's talk about yoga. And a new job. And feeling great.

For a week.

Let's talk about the one time in almost ten years I was eating without feeling any guilt.

For a week.

Let's talk about the perhaps kidney stone that is giving me grief.

Actually, let's not talk about any of that. No wait, we are going to talk about it. Just not the way you think we are.

Everything was going so well. Yoga was awesome. I was losing weight. I was happy. I was eating what I wanted, when I wanted. And I felt no guilt. Even when it was something completely fattening and unhealthy. I did not overeat or undereat. It was like a miracle. I haven't been that happy in.... what feels like forever. I was so excited. New job. New outlook on life. Happiness. Everything was not perfect, but it was the best it has been in I don't know how long.

And then the whole possible kidney stone, lots of pain, ickiness happened.

And I couldn't go to yoga. And since I was not working out I was suddenly assaulted with guilt over every bite. And depressed. And just watching a lot of TV after putting on a brave face for everyone at work all day. I hurt. (I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow). I am exhausted.

And I was so grumpy and mean and frustrated. I couldn't figure it out.

Until I realized something. Yes, I couldn't go to yoga and keep going on the path I wanted to this very second. But that doesn't mean I won't continue on that path as soon as I can!

This is why I am upset. It felt like quitting when I knew I shouldn't. But it isn't quitting. It is taking a break for my body.

I wish I could forget the number of times I have quit. Given up. Stopped. When I knew it was GOOD for me?!

Why do I do this? Why oh why oh why?!

I guess the first step is figuring out why I was so mad at me. The second step.... Well I'll talk to my therapist. Thank heavens I see her soon.

Goals

Guys, I can stand on my head.

Literally.

In less than a week I have learned to do a headstand. And it is pretty awesome. 

It all started last Wednesday when my husband pushed me out the door to yoga. I was in a depressive fog and was all, "I don't know.... blah blah blah excuses, blah, blah, excuses." And he was all, "Whatever, you're just full of excuses." And I was all, "Nu uh!!!"

And then I went.

Holy Aunt Jemima's Bloomers... Life changing.

Remember how on my birthday goals I said I wanted to do yoga consistently for three months? Well, I accidentally started it. And I am sooooo glad that I did.

I found a yoga teacher who just.... gently pushes me harder and harder. And on the second day of class, I was doing a headstand. The previous night I had introduced myself after class and mentioned that one day, once I was good enough, I wanted to learn how to do inversions. And the next day she said, "You've got the flexibility down. You've got the muscle. Let's do this."

And. I. Did. IT.

I am apparently superwoman. Cause I can just do things.

Last night, Day 3 of yoga, I did another kind of headstand (supported, but STILL) and I started learning how to do a forearm stand. 

And I had an incredible interview that went remarkably well.

And I had horchata. 

Gratitude is just pouring out of my heart. I am so grateful and happy for all that I have suddenly been given.

But the crazy part? It was there the whole time. This untapped potential. This desire and drive and ambition. The whole time. It has been waiting patiently for me to open my eyes and step out of the small box I have created for myself.

What could you do if you stepped out of your box? What potential is lurking just outside your comfort zone?

(Linking up with : Mingle Mondays Tell me Tuesday, GFC, Social Stack Up, Tell Me About It Tuesday, Followers to Friends)

Starting Over

Starting over can be hard. Especially when it is something you've never done before, because then it is just starting. But when it is something you've done before, and you just have to start at the beginning it can be tough.

Just remember, give it a week. Keep trying. Maybe it won't work out, but give it a week.

Mascara can be tricky, I know. I'm starting over with a whole new bottle this week. And new brushes don't always give me the perfect lashes I am looking for. But remember, patience. Everything will work out. Your eyelashes will be just as beautiful. Sometimes it is adjusting.

And if you are trying a whole new kind, well don't be afraid to walk away if it does not work out for you. Remember, this is your life. You do what makes you happy. Do not be held back by other people pushing you into a product you do not want to use.

You are strong. Do what feels right.

After all, they are YOUR eyelashes.

*I am sincerely hoping y'all picked up on the satirical streak in this post... otherwise you probably think I'm crazy. And you would probably be right...

(Linking Up With:  followers to friends, What I'm Loving Wednesday, Whatenver, Whenever, So What)

Sometimes...

Sometimes... being brave means doing something a lot of people will not understand. It means stepping into the dark and not knowing what is going to greet you. It means quitting a job with nothing lined up, for the sake of your personal happiness.

Sometimes... You realize that what you've been doing for the last 7 years isn't going to work any more. And if that means leaving jobs you are now over qualified for and heading to an industry you swore you would never work in... so be it. Sometimes... things change. And since working behind a desk seems to be slowly killing me, I'll find a job that doesn't. Whatever that is...

Sometimes... You find what it is you REALLY want to do with your life, but things are quite lined up to make it happen right now. So you start to practice patience. Lots and lots of patience.

Sometimes... Life gets crazy, crazy busy and you don't post on your blog every often. Which is fine.

Sometimes... You push out of your comfort zone to find a whole new world of possibilities.


Sometimes your husband just loves you...

This week my sweet husband went to the grocery store for me. I had a massive headache, a lesson to prepare and a paper to write. He took grocery shopping off my hands and went off to buy some bread and milk and protein shakes.

He came home with a new Kindle Paperwhite FOR ME!!!

I made a huge *GASP* inhale noise, and about died. No seriously, I was choking pretty badly. And squeaking horribly. It was a mix between a chipmunk being stabbed repeatedly and an old man with emphysema. My husband just stood there and laughed at me.


I am SO excited to play with my new toy!!! (I am pretty much addicted to reading... so... yeah. Best gift EVER. And he surprised me with my very first Kindle when we were first married. This man knows me. He loves me. And he shows me he loves me!)

(linking up with the Friendly Friday Blog Hop,  Friday Favorite Things, That Friday Blog Hop, and Friendly Friday)

My Weirdo Running

The only thing consistent with my running is knee pain.

Which I couldn't exactly understand. I mean, I'm young! So I should be all... pain and injury free, right?

Wrong.

Apparently, I run a little.... funny. Here I thought I had good form. I was trying pretty hard. You know, strike on the right part of my foot, lift my feet up, chest and back straight.

I could not figure out why I always ended up with pain in my left knee. Its awful! And then, last night, I swallowed my pride and asked my husband to watch my running form.

Low and behold, I run... weird. I wish I could explain this... here, let me try and draw you a picture.

I never claimed to be an artist! What I am trying to explain here is that when I bring my left foot down it turns inward. And I look like a gimp. And it is not good, and doing a number on my knee.

How I did not notice this for... who knows how long... I don't know. Stephen was imitating my run, over exaggerating most definitely (or at least he better have been, or I am in worst shape than I already am), but it looked utterly ridiculous. So now I have to work on correcting that, which is going to do a number to my miles and timing. But I guess it will be worth it...

I am not the only who who does stupid stuff like this, right? I mean, now I am going to be self conscious about my weird-o running style. I can't be the only one...

(linking up with the Friendly Friday Blog Hop,  Friday Favorite Things, That Friday Blog Hop, and Friendly Friday)

Spirit of Adventure

Maybe it is cabin fever. Maybe it is my sense of adventure twitching after being shoved in a corner. And maybe it is my secret daredevil deciding that my life is just to damn boring.

I don't know.

But I feel like I have just woken up after months of hibernation. I have a need to be outdoors. I have a thirst for sunshine (it IS winter. I kind of always have this unquenchable thirst for warmth and sunshine). I want to MOVE.

I don't know if anyone remembers this post. Or if you've read why I'm blogging on my about me page. I have a fun little daily battle with my own personal monster, depression. And it has been in full swing for the past several months. I've been so busy, literally buried in things to do, combined with our freezing winter, horrible air quality and complete lack of sunshine... I've had a hard time keeping my head above water.

You can only procrastinate for so long, hide from life with TV and drown your sorrows in food. I saw my therapist last week (I highly recommend therapists, they are awesome) and this morning I woke up with fire. With hope. With the desire to go climb a mountain.

I feel alive! I want to go and do and be and LIVE. And this is a wonderful feeling after feeling numb for so long.

I'm doing all I can every day to fight back. Working out, making plans with friends, laughing with my husband and getting as much sunshine as I can (fake and real). And I think it is starting to pay off.  I am ready for adventure!

And I am SO thankful for that feeling. And to perpetuate and keep the positivity, loving-life attitude here are some big and little things I am looking forward too!

• Running a half-marathon in August with a good friend.
• Easter!
• Almost being done with the history class from hell.
• Doing THIS this summer (it is going to be EPIC)

• Seeing my brother in August (he has been gone for 18 months! AH!)
• Girls night this Saturday
• The Bachelor EVERY Monday. (don't judge, and I'm not sure what I'll do when this seasons is over!)
• Working out every night with my husband.
• Lasagna
• New books to read, and some time to actually read them!
• Watching Pitch Perfect for the fourth time (the hubs gave it to me for Valentine's Day!, I need to do a whole post on this movie...)
• Sleeping in on Saturday (it is the ONLY day of the week I get to sleep in. We have church waaaaayy to early on Sunday morning)
• Making my husband laugh.

What are you looking forward too? What are you thankful for? Is there any daredevil activities you wish you could do?

(Linking up with: It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday, Thankful Thursdays)

New Series

Hey y'all, are you ready for a treat? Or at least a laugh... maybe a small chuckle?!

Well, here you go! I am posting over at Mrs. Rogers Neighborhood today all about Dating Disasters and other Embarrassing Moments. You don't want to miss this! It is all about the first time I held a boy's hand. Scandalous, no?

So, check it out! And if you like our sweet Mrs Rogers (remember this awesome post?!) then you should follow her! She is one of my bestest friends.

You Know You Married the Right Man When...

You know you married the right man when...

He holds you and doesn't even crack a smile when you cry over missing your cat that had to go to a new home 6 months ago. In fact, instead of laughing, he tells you that he understands and knows that it hurts.


He catches you using a blanket as a cape, and acts like nothing unusual is happening as you trail around the house sweeping your cape behind you.

He knows that when you crawl under the blankets and hide all the way up to your eyeballs, you are really asking for a good long cuddle and some kissing.

He recognizes your, "This is so intense!" face when you are reading a good book, and doesn't disturb you even though he really, really wants too.

He watches The Bachelor with you every week, and even gets into it enough to discuss why some girls are good and some are bad, and does it all with a straight face.


He helps you search ALL of Disneyland to find a Tinkerbell keychain with your name on it. He is the one who doesn't give up, and he doesn't complain once.

He says that you should go get pedicures with the girls every month, and you didn't even say anything to coerce him into saying it.

He makes you choose because he knows that you hate choosing out of fear you'll pick something no one else likes. He knows that you never get to go where you want, so even though you curse when he makes you choose, you finally get to eat where you want too.

He scrapes your car when he can in the morning, cause he knows how much you detest scraping your car windows in the cold morning.

He lets you interrupt his homework so that you can sit on his lap and very seriously tell him, "Winter is going to kill me. And I am starving to death." Even though he knows you'll live and you just ate a sandwich, it just wasn't very tasty.

He goes to Target for something, and comes back with a cute dress for you. "Just because."

I could go on and on and on. But these are just a few reasons why I know I married the right man.



How do you know you found the right guy for you?

(Linking up with: It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday,)

Lovey Dovey Crap

In case you haven't noticed from the bombardment of pink, red, hearts and lovey dovey commercials, Valentine's day is right around the corner. Like... tomorrow.

Now, I've never been a big fan of this Holiday. I was, for like two months once, but after that... eh. Just consumerism at it's most chocolatey.

When I was 17, my high school boyfriend (Whom I dated off and on for almost 6 years) wanted to give me a Valentine. Sweet, right? Except his family didn't approve so much. Like, at all. (I'm not sure what I did to turn the whole clan against me, but whatevs. He was the best high school boyfriend a girl could ask for, no joke.) He worked the early morning shift stocking a grocery store, so on his way home from work he brought me roses and some other sweet little gifts. It was incredibly precious and so sweet of him. And even though I'm racking my brain and I can't for the life of me remember what else it was he brought me, I still remember feeling so cherished. He was thoughtful, and went waaaaaaaaaay out of his way to give me a valentine. 

Of course, what did I give him? Umm.... I really don't want to admit this. I had no clue what to give a boy for Valentine's Day. And I mean, no clue. So I was all... "Boys like... duct tape. And flashlights. And... candy? Right?!" So that is what I gave this thoughtful young man. And, bless his heart, he acted excited and sweet and like I was the best thing that ever happened to him. You don't get relationships like that ever day. And I definitely didn't value him until he was gone. 

Of course, let us not forget the crappiest Valentines almost ever. I had a missionary out (more on that in the next story) and was pretty much alone. I wasn't getting along with my roommate, I hadn't made any new friends at the university, my car battery had died that morning and there was no parking anywhere on campus. And then, to top it all off, I got pulled over by a FEMALE cop! Now, we all know that as a woman pulled over by a male cop, you have a pretty good chance of talking your way out of the ticket. Female cop? Forget about it! (I wish I could type that as Joey says it on Friends...)

Somehow, I managed to talk my way out of this ticket. It wasn't easy. This woman was obviously pissed that she was working Valentines day. And that she was alone, and had to wear an incredibly unflattering uniform. But by some miracle, I was not ticketed. This didn't stop me from going home and bawling my eyes out though. After I worked 4 hours talking to lonely truckers that is... (Nothing to cheer up a girl like hearing an old 50 year old chain smoker tell you that you "Sound awfully sexy." Please note, I worked helping tuckers get hired by big trucking companies.)

And then there was the Valentine's day that I go engaged... You heard me. Engaged. And let me preface this story by saying, it didn't pan out. Like, heartbreakingly didn't pan out. Which is why I always, always, tell guys to never, ever, ever propose on a holiday. You never know what could happen, and you're setting yourself up with never being able to top that gesture of love. You don't want that.  

Anywhoo, Valentine's day fell on a Sunday that year. We had a nice quiet morning, went to church with my family, and then we had dinner with my whole family at my parent's house. Suddenly, everyone was all, "Hey, we're gonna go... somewhere." And they all left. So, X and I (we shall call him X, cause that is what he is) sat down at the table and together we put together, The Book. He had served an LDS Mission for two years, and I had written him every week of his mission. He wrote back. So that day, we sat down and put together the book. It was our letters back and forth so that it was like reading a story. Seems super sweet, right? It was. Around sunset he was all, "Hey, let's go for a drive!" And I was all, "It's kinda cold, but sure!"

He drove to the end of the dirt road we lived on (we weren't hicks, we just had a farm like place and lived in a small town). At the end of the dirt road, there was this beautiful spot. The road was lined with poplars on both sides. It was here that we had our first real "talk". That we spent hours watching the stars and countless sunsets. There were picturesque fields filled with fireflies in the summer. Real Anne of Green Gables stuff. And then, he got down on one knee, in the mud, and popped the question. It wasn't eloquent. It was just simple. And it was beautiful. Until he broke my heart a few weeks before the wedding and effectively ruined Valentine's day. 

Last year, I spent Valentines day in bed with my cat. My husband was gone with the military. I was incredibly lonely. I had tried to brighten my day by making Valentine cupcakes for the office. And everyone loved them. So that was nice. But it didn't change the fact that I was very much alone. 

This year is going to be different! I have V-Day all planned out for my hubby. It isn't anything crazy elaborate, but it is going to be time together. And I ream really looking forward to it.

Have you had any crappy Valentine's days? I know I'm not the only one! 

It Ain't Fair: Shaving Edition

Life's not fair. I get it. Trust me. I live in Utah. Some people live in Florida. Not fair. (In case you miss how that is not fair, let me just say that I HATE snow, and I am 90% positive that I am solar powered. More on that later)

You know what is really and truly not fair? Shaving. Look, I know all about how the media and society have objectified, sexualized and marginalized women. And it upsets me. Like a lot. Drives me absolutely nuts! But this goes beyond that. 

Shaving. It is not socially acceptable to go around with a bunch of leg/armpit hair: FOR WOMEN. Men can say, "Yeah, well I have to shave my face!" Big whoop. You can have a beard. And sometimes they look super cool. And I have seen some stellar mustaches. Some men shave their chests, but you know what fellas? Society won't look aghast at your lack of grooming if you don't. But us pretty ladies? We have to shave half our body. And sure, we can hide it with jeans and leggings and sometimes tights (tights can be gnarly on unshaved legs), but at the end of the day... we have to shave.

Shaving takes up a lot of time. I am pretty sure that if 5 women collectively took all the time it takes for them to properly shave every month, they would have enough time to solve the national deficit. 

I've thought about this a lot. And, from discussions with my husband, yes I love the feeling of my smooth legs (especially when I climb into soft, clean sheets at night). BUT I would never have to know the feeling of stubble on HALF MY BODY if I had never had to shave. Think about it. What if we all grew up thinking that it was sexy for men to be hairless beings. How would you like that menfolk? Huh? Years and years ago, women didn't have to shave. It just wasn't done (We also rarely bathed more than once a week, but I digress).

WHO came up with the crazy, outlandish idea that women should be hairless. And I mean HAIRLESS. My ladybits, they don't like the razor. TMI? I don't think so. Cause y'all are thinking it. Men have different preferences. And we women usually try to accommodate (You know it is true. I have many a friend who keeps a certain hair length/color because their man likes it, so I know this applies as well.) Some men just want some nice grooming. You know, trimming down the wilderness. Others want not a hair in sight (talk about a lot of work!). Some men like it "au naturel" and you can have yourself a thicket. But those men are rare. 

Oh the time! The TIME it takes to keep oneself hairless. And don't even get me started on cost (I can't use those cheap razors. I just can't. And then some women WAX! And Laser Hair Removal! Oh the agony! Oh my WALLET!) If women stopped shaving, put all the money they put towards razors/shaving cream/lotion/waxing/laser hair removal then all that money together would solve the deficit. 

I know that I can't change things. I know that I won't go all hippy and stop shaving my legs in protest. I know that I will always appreciate the smooth feeling that follows for the ONE (and only one) day that follows shaving. I know defeat when I see it.

But you know what I DO want? I want a sincere thank you from men everywhere for following their crazy, outlandish, against nature's request to shave half our body. A thank you. A sweet gesture of appreciation. Maybe they should try shaving all that we shave every once in a while to truly appreciate all we go through. And maybe we should have a shaving appreciation day. 

I guess what I am trying to say is... can't a gal get a thank you for shaving? Is that too much to ask for?

(Linking up with : Mingle Mondays Tell me Tuesday, GFC, Social Stack Up, Tell Me About It Tuesday)

Stuck

Remember when I wrote about this post? 

Well, I'm stumped. I've been doing a lot of thinking and soul searching and staring at things in a daze. I want a .... something. I want a career, a passion. I want to make my passion a career.

Problem: I have a ton of passions. Let's list just a few, shall we?

Yoga

Running

Reading

Being Outdoors

Helping others

Writing

Watching TV (Yes this is passion, ok?)

Listening to stories.

But here is what I have realized in compiling that list.

The thing I love more than anything, my driving passion, why I majored in History, why I read voraciously is... stories. I LOVE stories. I wrote this post on stories and why I love them so much. But... what do I do? I think I am afraid to write. Which is sad, but true. I want to write, I really do. But I worry that I will never be able to make any career out of that. (not that I need a career to write. I just... I want one. I want my words to be recognized and read and loved. I want to touch someone as I have been touched. I want to give people an escape, just as I have escaped into my favorite book when Life gets too rough. Is this a selfish desire? I don't know...) 

And then I ask myself, do I want a career? I know that I want to do something with my life along with being a mother. 

I also know that what I really want is to be a mother. It is important to me, it is a big part of my upbringing, but also a part of me. When I look at my youngest sister, whom I have helped raise and care for since she was born, I feel so much love. Such a fierce, beautiful, painful, all consuming love. And I know that having my own children will create an even deeper love. And I want that. I love the feel of her small hand in mine. I love that when she broke her arm, she asked for me to go with her to the scary doctor. I love how some part of me feels more complete when I hold her. And when I see how much she has grown, when I watch her be a grown up kid and not my baby, my heart hurts in a good way. I want that. I want that for my whole life. I want the joy, frustration, love, pain, laughter, tears, long nights and happy memories of motherhood.

I also want more. But my upbringing and culture all says I should be happy with motherhood. And I know I will be. 

But I want more.

How do people do this? My future is firmly planted in motherhood. So when I look ahead at any kind of career path, I automatically begin to factor in things like, "Can I do this from home? Will it have flexible hours? How will I make it work? Will I have enough time for my kids and home and husband?"

How do you people do it?!

I know I am not the only young woman who looks at her future and wants to pull her hair out. I talk to friends and we all look at our future in absolute confusion. Different desires pulling us in different directions.

My biggest question right this very second is, "What do I do, RIGHT NOW?!" I am in a rather dead end job. I am one tiny step away from having a degree, that I have no clue what to do with, and now is not the time for us to start a family.  Do I want to be a hair stylist? Yoga instructor? Teacher? I know, I know, that I want to be a writer. But, as my husband pointed out, I can write while doing other things. Do I want to do other things? I have to work. Right now, I am our main provider while my husband finishes school. I have to work. But I don't want to just... work. I want to enjoy what I do.

I do not enjoy being a receptionist. So.... I'm stuck. 

What do y'all think? Anyone in the same boat? Anyone know where I am coming from? Or am I a little crazy? Advice? Anyone...?

(Linking up with: followers to friends, What I'm Loving Wednesday, Whatenver, Whenever, So What It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday,)

The Trifecta of Grumpydom

There are three things that just shouldn't happen at the same time for any woman.
1. You're Period
2. A Cold
3. Zero Sleep

Alone, they still make life unpleasant. All together? It is like the trifecta of grumpydom. I mean, one of those things on their own is enough to make a girl wanna punch through a window.

I know that my period is unavoidable. Its gonna happen, so I am a little more resigned to that. But it doesn't mean the cramps get any more pleasant (its like my uterus is trying to implode, or lead a coup to kill me from the inside out!). Or the hormones easier to deal with (Don't judge, I might have thrown things at the TV during the Bachelor last night).

Don't even get me STARTED on a cold. I have zero patience with a stuffy nose. None. It makes me irritated at everyone and everything. I would rather have the stomach flu for 24 hours and be done with it, than have a stuffy/drippy nose for three weeks.

And zero sleep. Need I say more?

Needless to say, I am a grump today. Four chocolate kisses and herbal tea didn't even dent the gloom that surrounds my desk. When ever I page someone over the intercom, it sounds like I am telling whatshisbucket or whosisface that their imminent doom is on line 3. I think the shipping department has stopped approaching my desk for fear that decapitation is just around the corner.

I am sorry world. Truly I am. Maybe tomorrow I will be a nicer version of me. Don't hold your breath or anything, but hope is always a nice thing to have.

(Linking  up with: Tell me Tuesday, GFC, Social Stack Up, Tell Me About It Tuesday)

My Graceful Moments

My whole life I've been known as a klutz. I've been teased for tripping over the lines painted on a basketball court. I spent my entire time at Disneyland tripping over my own feet. My husband laughed at me, as did my aunt and uncle as I continued to do what I call "stutter-walking". You know, walking along and then catch your feet on nothing and take a couple of ungraceful stutter-steps. I did that pretty much the whole time. The tips of my toes were bruised from being shoved into the front of my shoe.

I am such a rebel.

Well, Saturday night I had yet another confrontation with the stairs. We often go head to head, and I always seem to lose. This Saturday was more alarming than most, however. Usually I walk up the stairs, trip and fall forward. Sometimes I trip over a stair going downstairs and have to catch my balance.

This time, I was racing down the stairs (for no apparent reason) and tripped on the third stair I stepped on, rolled my ankle, thought I caught my balance only to go thudding and rolling down the rest of the staircase. It was loud and dramatic sounding. Dramatic sounding from the thuds, thumps and my screech. By the time I landed at the bottom of the stairs my brother in law was at the top of the stairs about ready to fly down and restore life to what could only be assumed to be my unconscious body. My husband had flown to the banister and about jumped over the banister to say his final good bye.

Both looked monumentally concerned.

Until I started laughing hysterically. I was fine. The left side of my body is nicely bruised, my ankle a little tender, but nothing bad. Upon seeing that I wasn't dead, they both laughed and spent the rest of the night teasing me for my grace and dignity.

I wish I could say this was one funny moment in my life. In reality, this is one moment among many. For a few years the X-ray tech at our local hospital new me quite well. I just seem to have a magnet for disaster.

Am I the only person who has trouble with stairs? Anyone else have any good klutzy moments they'd like to share?

My Happy Place

Sometimes you just have to run away. To Disneyland. Which is what I am doing this weekend. Finally.

I haven't been on an actual vacation in I don't know how long. Way too long. Months and months. Christmas was NOT a vacation. I had only Christmas day and New Years day off. (That's right, I worked Christmas Eve and New Years Eve. And it sucked). So THIS is my Christmas Vacation. And my Anniversary Celebration. It is a lot of things.

It is leaving the worst air in the nation. It is going to sunshine. It is leaving work and school behind. It is warmth. It is a hot tub. It is the happiest place on earth. Is roller coasters. It is the best breakfast in the universe (more on this later). It is stress free time with my busy husband.

It is the best thing EVER.

And amid all my frustrations, panic attacks, papers, work, laundry, dishes, French and chaos I get to go to my happy place. For reals guys. Not just closing my eyes, taking deep breaths and imagining myself in my happy place. I get to physically go there.

You can't beat that!


Of course, as I have thought about the joy of physically going to my happy place, I have decided that I really need to work on developing this inner peace that allows me to physically be in a new happy place. A place that doesn't need anything to exist. It just simply is. It is. Peace. Quiet. Love. Acceptance. Serenity.

Yeah, I want all of that in my life all the time.

So here is to my happy place, physically and spiritually. Cheers!

Where is your physical happy place? How do you develop a spiritual happy place you can carry around with you? Do tell, I want to hear what you have to say!

This little guy has obviously already found his happy place!
P.S. - This was my dog Dexter. I miss him like crazy!

(Linking up with: followers to friends, What I'm Loving Wednesday, Whatenver, Whenever, So What It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday,)

The Crunchy Mama

Today, y'all will be hearing from Mrs Rogers. AKA - one of my best friends. We are army wives together, and while she may be "Crunchier" than I am, I'm not too far behind in some things. I love being around her because she is honest, hilarious and sincere. She is here today to tell us about her dive into crunchie-dom. If you like what you read, which you will, head on over to her blog!

First, I want to say thanks to Jeannie for suggesting this post swap! I'm excited to be here on One Wish Short... sharing with all of Jeannie's lovelies!

Let's get this out of the way right off the bat--I'm a weirdo hippie witch doctor. And a cheapskate. Happy now? Okay. Moving on.

As the world turns, it continues to get more strange...and complicated. We are constantly bombarded with products and practices that are supposed to make our lives easier. Like most people, I just went with the flow of society for a long time. Sort of. I mean...my mom and brother and sister all have ADD, so my mother was all about keeping our sugar intake in check. No kool aide, no coco puffs, etc. Aside from that, though, we were pretty "normal".

It all started when my mom went back to school and did this research project about a "controversial" subject. She chose to address the "Is milk REALLY good for you?" topic. What she found was horrifying on multiple counts. We were milk drinkers. A couple of gallons a week. We drank it with everything. And that came to an abrupt halt after Mom's research project. There was a lot of protest from us, but after I did my own senior year research project to prove her wrong (and accidentally ended up proving her right), I gladly gave it up and haven't looked back.

Since then, my mother and I have challenged the mainstream on almost all fronts. If the government is trying to convince us that cow milk is okay to drink (and that it's actually GOOD for us!), what else are they allowing us to naively bring into our homes and put in our bodies?

Holy crap. Do NOT dive into that subject until you are fully prepared to be disgusted, guilt-ridden, and outraged.

I'm serious.

The more homework I do, the more my life changes. I'm not some crazy super-hippie, but I definitely don't live the way society expects me to. I'm fine with that, though! We (my family) are slowly working our way toward being toxin-free, y'all. It's all about baby steps. Everything--EVERY. SINGLE. THING.--I'm about to discuss seemed so "out there" and weird to me when I first heard or read about it. Almost all of it took a few times of seeing or reading about it to get me to a point where I would try it. I would see something and think "Okay, I'm not THAT crunchy..." and, sure enough, I would eventually try it and it would life-altering.

Let's talk cleaning. How many different cleaning products do you have in your house? Count them--kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, etc. There's stuff for dishes, something else for floors, another thing for carpets, and about ten thousand different items for counters, sinks, tubs, toilets, walls, brass, stainless, ceramic, glass, etc. So now that you've gathered all of those things up (or you've got them gathered...in your head...) tell me how many of them you would drink? *crickets* No takers? Okay, how many of them would you let a small child/toddler/baby play with? Still none? Huh. Weird. Guess what my number is? Five. Yup. That's it. And I don't have to lock my cleaning cabinets or call poison control if my three-year-old gets his hands on them. I clean with vinegar, hydrogen peroxide, baking soda, all-natural dish soap, and all-natural laundry detergent. No toxic chemicals. No dyes. No artificial scents. Just a happy, clean, poison-free home! Super weird, huh? I swear they all work! And can we just talk about how stinking CHEAP it is to clean "my way"? No need to break the bank. You could probably get all of the "cleaners" on my list for under ten bucks and clean your whole house. And guess what? I actually just found out about an all-natural home made "bleach" that I really really really want to try. I can't wait to see how it works!

Moving on. Take a look at your medicine cabinet. Ho-lee-crap. Talk about artificial, toxic crap. I won't lie to you, though, I do still have some of that junk in my house. I really should just throw it out, but I've spent so much money accruing my little pharmacy and I wince at the thought of tossing it out...even though I have a natural alternative that works even better. This is where "witch doctor" gets thrown around. When I first heard about this, I rolled my eyes. A big, huge, exaggerated eye roll. It sounded SO hokey to me. I'm talking about essential oils. Hear me out, though! I really thought it was all such a crock until I used some good quality (and by that, I mean doTERRA--internationally recognized as the best, purest essential oils you can get your hands on IN THE WORLD) oils and they worked better than anything I had ever tried. And now I'm hooked. I mean, why take an aspirin when you can use the naturally-occurring form of it (wintergreen) instead. Especially when the natural form works better, faster, and has no negative or harmful side effects? There is no over-dosing. There is no harm when mixed with XYZ. Just all natural health--the way God intended it. It's fantastic! And while everyone else is complaining about their kids getting sick? Mine are healthy and happy and fit as a fiddle. Call me a witch doctor all you want, but this stuff works! I'm a believer for life!

Now I want to talk personal care. What you put on your skin is just as important as what you put in your body. Because what you put on your skin gets absorbed into your body--so it's basically the same thing. What do you wash your face with? Take a look at the list of ingredients in your "skin care" products. Do you know what every single thing on that list is? Can you tell me why each ingredient is in there and what effect it has on your body? Probably not. Guess what I wash my face with? Olive oil and castor oil. Super weird, right?! That's what I thought the first fifty times I heard/saw it. And then I tried it. My life is changed forever. Guess what else? Also CCCHHHEEEAAAPPP. What do you moisturize with? I have a challenge for you. This is an easy first step into hippiedom. Try coconut oil. No joke. That's all I use (well...I also use some home made body butter that I whipped up a few months ago--but it contains FOUR ingredients--all natural, and one of them is coconut oil) on myself and my children. My husband has switched over too. It just....works. I know what you're thinking--"OIL? You want me to moisturize with OIL?? Gross." But it's not. Coconut oil is solid at room temperature and melts at about 76 degrees. It smells awesome and it's naturally antibacterial, antimicrobial, and anti-fungal. It is ALSO...an antioxidant. BA-ZING! Now you have no reason not to try it. "But, Ashley, I have a skin condition..." Hold it right there, buster. You are NOT excused! Have you ever heard of keratosis pilaris? KP is a skin condition that I passed on to my son. The doctor prescribed Amlactin (stinky lotion that stung). KP is successfully combated in our house with coconut oil. I even converted a friend who has a bad case of eczema - she tried coconut oil and totally wiped it out! If you take nothing else from this--at LEAST go get yourself some coconut oil.

There are so many other things I would LOVE to talk about today, but no one wants to read a novel on blogger. If you wanted to read a novel, you'd be reading one. So I'm going to leave you with one last crunchy mom topic of discussion: cloth diapers. Don't log off! Cloth diapers nowadays are not what your grandmother used fifty years ago. They're cute! And easy! Sure, you can still get flats and prefolds (what Grandma used), but you can also get cloth diapers that look like...well, diapers. Same shape, velcro and/or button closure, water proof, leak proof, and cute to boot! I first explored cloth diapering when I was pregnant with my oldest, but was overwhelmed and gave up on the idea...until I became pregnant with my daughter. I did some good old fashioned research and I just couldn't bear the thought of using disposable diapers anymore! There are three things that converted me: cost, health, the "green" factor. First off--do you know how much the average American family spends on disposable diapers in a year? $1500. In ONE YEAR. Holy hell. Cloth diapers? Well, you spend a few hundred bucks (varies depending on what style of diapers you choose) and that's it! For the ENTIRETY of your diapering. Sure, some will wear out after a ton of use and you'll have to buy more. But a good bunch of them can be used for multiple kids--the savings just keeps piling up! Second issue--health. There are so many chemicals in disposable diapers. (how do you think they get the pee to gel up?) And they are all right up close and personal with baby's tender parts! Yipe! Cloth diapers...not so much! You've got natural fibers (cotton, hemp, etc.) and whatever laundry detergent you decide to use. We have happy heinies at my house. And finally, the green factor. We are all trying to be more environmentally conscious, right? RIGHT?! I don't think I really need to get into the details about how BILLIONS of disposable diapers are clogging up landfills all over the country every year. Or about how it takes over 500 years for them to decompose. Cloth diapers remedy that problem. Shazzam. And again--so cute.

I dare you to challenge the mainstream. Do a little digging and see how you can simplify your life with natural, non-toxic solutions. I promise you'll be glad you did!! If you have any questions to ask or want to point your fingers and laugh at me from a safe distance, feel free to do so over at Mrs. Rogers' Neighborhood. We'll be addressing each of these topics (among others) in more depth in the coming weeks, so be sure to tune in!

This is Crunchy Mamma (a.k.a. Mrs Rogers) signing out!

P.S. At some point we may explore my overuse of quotation marks, ellipses, and exclamation points. Maybe. (I make no "promises"!!!)

Coming Home

This is a post I wrote last year when I got to see my husband for the first time in months due to his service in the military. I thought I would share it again with everyone because it just hit me how wonderful it is to know that at the end of this work day, I get to go home to my husband. It is the most beautiful miracle a girl could ask for.

I was waiting for Stephen at the airport. And I thought I would pass out before he actually got here. I was bouncing around, trying really hard to hold still, and failing miserably. The airport was crowded with a bunch of people with signs for LDS missionaries coming home, long lines of people waiting to get through security and people pouring out of the exit and into the baggage claim. They all smiled at me indulgently, probably thinking I was waiting for a missionary.

I saw Stephen coming around the corner from his reflection in the glass and I promised myself that I would hold still.

I lied to myself.

As soon as he got out from that long hallway I found myself running towards him and throwing myself in his arms. The whole airport burst into cheers. People in the security line were jumping up and down, random people took pictures. It sounded like we had just won a big football game. Everyone was yelling, clapping and cheering like crazy. And it went on for a while. I was crying, with my head buried in his uniform and arms wrapped firmly around his neck. He maneuvered us to the back of the crowd, carrying me and two large back packs. I was too overwhelmed with happiness to be of much help. We just held each other for a minute, and I cried some more, and then made our way to the escalator.

As we went up, people below saw us and again started cheering.

It was awesome.

And I think that for the first time ever, the outside world sounded exactly like how I was feeling inside.

Plans for the Current

Holy guacamole on a hot beef burrito, ALL of my friends have a baby or are about to have a baby. And I'm all, "I'm about to have a degree."

Which I am ok with.

Which scares a lot of people.

And I'm ok with that.

Which really scares people.

And... I could go on forever like this. You catch my drift.

Fact is, I don't want a baby right now. Eventually, yeah I do. Right now, I want a kitten.

Like this one:

Or this one:

Or this one:

But I digress... (I think I just looked at pictures of kittens for like 20 minutes...) What I am trying to say is right now I would love to have a kitten over a baby. Even a puppy seems like too much work right now.

Guys, I am not some freak of nature for wanting to wait on the whole kid thing (which might sound reasonable to some, and crazy to others). I want time with my husband. After all the time I have spent away from him, and all the time we've spent on homework and work instead of having time for each other, having a baby right now seems... kinda horrible to the baby.

And, here comes the big part (mother, hold on to your parasol), I want to start a career. A business. Finish writing a book. Travel.

I was raised believing that being a mother was the highest and greatest calling a woman could ever have. And I still believe that. Motherhood is beautiful and terrifying and wonderful and important. And I want to be ready.

I want to live so I can show my kids how to go after their dreams. I want to learn to help them learn. But mostly, and this is most important even if it does come across as selfish, I want to better myself. I want to be strong, happy, successful (by my definition) and most of all I want to just love the life I have.

I haven't had time to really live. I haven't learned to live until recently. I've been busy with the formal education and working part. I am so close to the "living" part now. I am learning that each day is a day to live. Whether or not I have homework, laundry, angry customers or a cold. I can still LIVE. And that is what I want to do. Live as just me, before adding the title of mother.

And that is ok.

(Linking up with: followers to friends, What I'm Loving Wednesday, Whatenver, Whenever, So What It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, It's Ok Thursday,)

Strength

I fully recognize that I should be doing homework right now. And by should, I mean I should have started and finished about three hours ago. But life happens. Like grocery shopping... or watching  The Bachelor.

See, life.

And even as I sit here to write, I realize that I don't have a whole lot to say. I just simply wanted to open up my conduit of creativity and let words become thoughts. And those thoughts help me release, realize and rejoice over so many things.

Recently I have discovered that I have found strength. Strength in demanding my worth, in defending my sanity and in never backing down from a fight that should be fought (most fights aren't ones we should be dividing ourselves over).

You see, I have hated my job. And when I say hate, I mean panic attacks on Sunday night when I know I have to go to work the next morning - hate. Crying in the bathroom at work because the pressure and the stress is getting to be too much. And knowing that at the end of every day, I am not doing anything that builds me or anyone else up.

I answer the phone, direct the calls, enter the orders and do the menial tasks that no one else wants to do. I get screamed at for other people's mistakes, and it is my job to apologize like there is no tomorrow. I have task after task heaped upon me because, after all, I am just the receptionist. What in the world do I have better to do than to create a ridiculous spreadsheet?

I am capable of so much more. I have so much more to offer the world. In the past, I have just laid down and been a doormat. Being silently miserable. But no longer. Thanks to so many life lessons, and mostly to a husband who supports and loves me, I had the moral courage to walk into my boss's office and tell him how absolutely miserable I am. To tell him he was most definitely NOT paying me enough. To tell him that the expectations placed on me were unrealistic. And man did it feel good.

At the end of the talk, I am afraid my boss felt that he had assuaged all my fears and given me many comforting words of advice. And he did have a couple of plans to help make my day a little easier. But the truth of the matter is, I am not satisfied working a dead-end job as the "front desk girl". And if something better comes along, I WILL take it. Because I deserve better. Because I am someone worth fighting for. Because my happiness is worth a whole lot more than that measly paycheck.

I have found strength in my weakness. That is what God does to people. And I am so grateful He does.

Because I Am

I need to write not only as a release, but to build in my life everything I have been looking for everywhere else. My world has been peopled with imaginary friends, villains and passersby for as long as I can remember. Romance has flowed like music through my thoughts since I was a child, sparked by my parents' love for each other. And that romantic side of myself was nurtured, and often over watered, with books and movies and love songs. And soon I thought that love could only come in that form. In the form of perfect lyrics and cinematic drama. With a grand force that left me with no choice but to surrender my heart and soul to my handsome, modern day prince.

But love came jarringly. With heartbreaks, abandonment, fear and quiet moments of revelation. I have moments that I can recall looking at the face of the man I loved, and loving the very particles of air that touched his skin. Of memorizing the lines in his face, the contours of his chest and the sound of his voice. But those moments were broken, shattered by the harsh realities of two separate lives, headed in directions that would not meld. In utter rejection. In finally seeing that the fairytale man that I had so sacredly given my heart too, was human. And couldn't love me then. And my love had not learned patience.

And so I learned to love the real in a man. The faults, the fears and the temper. The misunderstandings that will always fuel arguments and feeling shut out. And as I fell in love, I had to loosen my iron grip on a real life fairy tale for the beautiful, brutal reality that is marriage. The kisses, the love and the quiet moments blossom among the dirty dishes and unmatched socks. I've learned to find romance and love in my husband's act of paying bills.

And though I have had to let go of the idea of beautiful moments, complete with background music and sweeping panoramic views, I still have my romance. And I am still very much in love.

But some part of me wants the dramatic beauty that comes from a romance in the land of fairies. In a made up reality. And so I write. And though I may be feeding the fire of some other girl's need to step into real life and hang up the fairy wings, I think that this belief in true love, prince charming and romance gives us all hope. Because myth was based on fact. And the fact is, I love my husband more than any movie character has loved another because I have stood outside the door as he vomited loudly, ready to jump in and take care of him regardless of how disgusted I was. Because he has loved me in my foolish moments of temper tantrums and hurtful words.

I have my fairytale. And what I write is merely taking all that is in my heart and interpreting it in a new way. I couldn't tell you what really happens to create so much love in my life because that will remain forever as the infinite and sacred bond between the man of my dreams and my faulty self.

I love because I am. I am because I love. I write because I have learned love.

(Linking up with: It's Almost Friday Thursday Blog Hop, Black Tag Diaries, First Day Of My Life, Pretty Little Inspirations, Link and Mingle, It's Ok Thursday,)

It's Been a Bit

Hello Friends!

I know it has been a while.

I had to take a break and LIVE. Not worry about link ups, blog posts, pictures, social media... all of that. I just wanted to enjoy what I could of my crazy busy holidays, and then take a breather.

My breather is over, and I am BACK! And excited to just.... write.

I've had a good couple of weeks. I've been hiking, sledding, movie-going, arcade playing and sleeping. I've enjoyed some time "unplugged". And I have also started to stretch and grow and discover more about life and love and myself.

And I am happy. Happier than I can ever remember being.

I can't wait to share more things with you. But for now, I will leave you with something I've recently discovered:

Learning to simply love. To think in love, to act in love and accept with love everyone around me. That is my focus. And though sometimes I fail and sometimes I blunder, I always try to return to who I am. To who we all are. A being of love, made in love, sent to earth to learn how to be the light of God's love to all the world.







(Linking up with: followers to friends, What I'm Loving Wednesday, Whatenver, Whenever, So What)